We interrupt this program. . .

On Tuesday I got laid off. Two hours later I smashed the bejesus out of my finger. The finger smash is an example of why I believe in God. There is a connectedness, an energy swirl, a call to be awake, to be true, to be touched by the people around us. All of this--the echo of something unseen that swells when I take a moment to be quiet and still--that is what God is to me.

I don't believe God smashed my finger--that's not how I think about this kind of thing. But here I am, on the flip side of a major life change and I have this painful, throbbing, red and purple fingernail that zings me every time it touches something. That finger touches lots of things. Each time I think one or several of the following:

"OW! That really hurts!"
"Whoa. I have no job."
"Man! I really slammed that thing hard."
"This is going to hurt for a while."

I appreciate the symmetry of the two events. And I am grateful for the invitation to pay attention. I was a part of that organization for a long time--three weeks shy of thirteen years. I actually felt physically different walking out the door. No more cell phone, no more laptop, no more key card. No job for the first time in many years.

I'll probably lose the nail. We'll definitely lose our baby-sitter--the person who has saved us these past many months as we've gone from two to four. 2015, like every other year, will be a year of change. It already is.